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Dear Vickie

I’m sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. I am always in overwhelm, doing do much and never have enough time to do it all. HELP?

Sally M

Dear Sally,

Yes, I hear you. Sometimes life can just go crazy, we get so so busy and sometimes don’t have enough hours in the day.  Honestly, if you don’t stop you will burn out, so you have to find a way.  My suggestion is start by ensuring that you set yourself up for success. Are you exercising each day? Are you taking some time out for you? Time to reflect, time for gratitude, sometimes these things seem too far away, that we just can’t fit them in, but the truth is that when we do, we become less stressed. The reality is that there are only so many hours in a day. If you allocate that time carefully and stick to it, you begin to allow the overwhelm to disappear. Step one. Plan your day.

Step two – stick to the plan

Step three – remind yourself that you are doing the best you can.

Dear Vickie,

I am at the end of my tether; I worry about everything all the time.  Help?

Ian

Dear Ian,

Step One – Ask yourself this question, “What is the worst thing that can happen? 

Step Two Ask yourself the questions, “If that does happen, what would I do?”

Step Three Remind yourself that whatever happens will happen and it will all be ok.

Tell yourself this – ‘Everything will be ok in the end, and if it’s not ok, it’s simply not the end.’

Just take one step at a time, on baby step forward, remind yourself that Rome wasn’t built in a day, but that every single day, another step forward towards building Rome was taken.

Dear Vickie,

I really want to let go of something that happened when I was 15, I’ve tried, but honestly, I just can’t.

Sonya. H.

Hi Sonya, 

Well first of all it really does depend on what happened, if it was a MAJOR trauma, then my advice is most definitely seek professional help. 

If on the other hand it is something that happened that upset you, or made you angry, or a fight with someone, then that’s a whole different story.  If it is the latter, then here is what I personally do.  And believe me I have had thing that I held on to for far too long myself.  It’s so interesting because we know that it would be better for us to let go, but we just don’t know how.  For me the only way I can really let go of something that happened in the past is to look for the learnings, looks for a reason to be grateful for the incidence, look for what it taught me, look for something, that because of that particular incident happening, helped me in some way.  Now sometimes to be honest the learning might be something not to do. But on the most part I try as hard as possible to look for something that I could learn that will serve me in a positive way.  I am then able to be grateful first of all for the learning, and then for the person that gave me the learning, this is how I am then able to  let it go and forgive them and maybe even forgive me.  Now let’s be real here, I don’t have to, if I don’t want to , forgive them in person. But I do have to forgive them in my heart. Sometimes for me this can be by writing them a letter, a letter that I never send. But you know what, the upset gets lifted, the pain gets lifted and I can move forward without the upset, without the anger.

Hope that helps.